A few years ago I embarked on a 6 month journey with members of my church. In safe groups we shared our stories, our hearts, and learnt the truth about what Jesus thinks of us. It was amazing. My group’s theme was titled ‘Free to be Me’, so appropriate for me.
One of our assignments was to write a letter to our “Poser”. So this is excerpts of mine:
You’ve made yourself very comfortable, but now it is time to get out of your comfort zone and to be ready for exposure. There have been too many perfect pictures of smiling satisfaction and feeling good, when deep down you are ashamed and fearful, unworthy. You have reached the point of no return. No more lies and fake bravado, shirking from decision-making – it’s the truth or nothing. I’m tired of you hiding away, lurking in the shadows, refusing to take a stand. I am tired of going along, conforming to whoever I am with, in order to fit in with whichever group I happen to be with. I want to shout from the rooftops, ‘I am God’s masterpiece, and he is everything to me!’ No more hiding and shrinking from saying the words to others, having Jesus in my conversation.
Stop with the analysing and deep thoughts… stop with your doubting and fearfulness, don’t bother going down that road… Pride is all stripped away, and none of that junk matters. So no more playing games with my head anymore, you have been exposed…. There’s no need to make things complicated, I know I am free to be me at last!
It was very freeing and healing to do this and to read it out loud to the group. It doesn’t mean that I am completely free of my poser, he does still creep in from time to time. But with God’s help I can usually recognise it and bring it to light, or someone who knows me well will show me the truth. I am also full of joy that this Prison Break series I am writing right now, only by his loving grace, is exactly timed, and it’s where God wants me to be.
Today is Day 18 of Prison Break of Thoughts – 31 Days of Inner Release