I can remember vividly the first time she laughed, I mean really laughed. It was the day of her Christening and we were staying in a beach house on the east coast. She was lying on her back in her pink and purple playpen and her crazy Auntie Bucket came over and put her face down near her, and began a series of weird faces and noises, pulling away every few seconds. The sweet, unmistakable sound of gurgling and baby laughter rang out and I ran to see. Each time her auntie put her face down the tiny baby would chuckle uncontrollably. Why couldn’t I do that? I guess my use was to comfort, provide the food and be the mother.
Making people laugh has never been my forte, but my husband makes up for it in the family, with some help from the kids. God knew me from the beginning of time and so he sent me a funny husband. We’re a good balance. I have never been able to tell a joke well, but occasionally I will do or say something that causes some laughter, and that will make me content, till the next time.
I remember the days as children when my sister closest in age to me would make me laugh and I would do the same for her. The little jokes only we understood, the foolish things we did. We sometimes laughed so hard that our stomachs hurt. The times with our childhood friends, very little was able to prompt that sweet sound of many different versions of chuckle, chortle, giggling with glee.
I would like to go back to the times when laughter came easily, before cynicism and some numbness crept in, before doing life became harder, before the comedian had to work so hard for a laugh. To be spontaneous in my guffaws.
Help me to laugh till the tears stream down my face. What a release that is going to be!
Today is day 10 of the series Prison Break of Thoughts – 31 Days of Inner Release that I am writing for #write31days challenge.